Sunday, June 24, 2007

"We said we were gonna play the game, like we had nothing to lose." - Danny Ocean from "Ocean's Eleven"

Sitting down, i thought to myself, "This is it. Lets take the plunge. Its all or nothing."

As the events fall into place like jigsaw pieces fitting each other perfectly, my stomach started to clenched in a tight knot.

My shoulders tensed up. My entire body went rigid and my palms grew sweaty. I kept thinking, "Please don't fail. Please don't fail. Please don't fail. Come on. Come on. Come on."


And then, it finally arrived.

Was i mis-seeing, indulging in a wish fulfillment? I found myself unable to speak, unable to rise to the occasion in any fashion. I mutely showed what i had.

My friends were stunned into silence. All of them stared in shock, their eyes couldn't quite believe what had happened. Only one recovered in time to whisper...

... ...

...

"Five-tai"

...

As exhilaration coursed through my body, the tension is released. All of a sudden, i felt weak and drained of energy. But how i felt was of no consequence and no importance. The next round has begun...

-----

Despite this happening three times, winning money is still always a good feeling.

Yes. Yes. I know. I'm rubbing it in. But hey, all of us are entitled to a little bit of self-congratulatory and vanity, are we not? :D

Saturday, June 16, 2007

Words of Wisdom from Very Wise Taxi Drivers

While i was taking a taxi back to the office on Friday, i struck up a comfortable conversation with the driver. He proudly stated his heritage:

  1. He's a orphan. His father died, and his mother left him.
  2. He has next to no education at all.
  3. As a result of that, he has "seen the world".
  4. But because he has believed in Buddhism, he has taken a vow and turned over a new leaf
  5. However, that doesn't stop him from having a girlfriend despite having a wife and kids.
  6. The said girlfriend is also married with kids.
  7. For the three years that they were together, she has never bought him a present during his birthday.
  8. He recently bought a $490 gold necklace for his girlfriend as a present, but she pawned it and left the receipt with him.
  9. This incident was the last straw that broke the camel's back. He admitted to not being very familiar with such affairs, but his girlfriend has "taught" him until he's familiar.
  10. He plans to abandon his girlfriend now.

With all these "sight-seeing of the world", he has a few Pearls of Wisdom to share:
  • A girlfriend is like a handphone. If you don't pay the service charge, the service will be terminated.
  • On the other hand, a wife is like a television. You only need to pay once and can use for free after that.
  • A girlfriend is like a handphone. You take it where-ever you go.
  • A wife is like a television. You leave it at home.

Don't you just love taxi drivers? They have a simple uncomplicated view of life. :)

Wednesday, June 13, 2007

Ok, this is slightly embarrassing now... Since it happened twice... (-.-)

I...

*Bashes head against the table*

Must...

*Bashes head against the table again*

Remember...

*Bashes head against the table again*

To...

*No wait, table's broken, bashes head against the wall*

Zip...

*Bashes head against the wall again*

My...

*Bashes head against the wall again*

Pants...

*Bashes head against the wall again*

Before...

*Bashes head against the wall again*

Going...

*Bashes head against the wall again*

Out...

*Bashes head against the wall again*

*dazedly looks around, fumbling for something to hang on to* Why do i have two doors in my room? And why is the room spinning?

*collapse*

Sunday, June 10, 2007

The Loss of Innocence, Naviety & The Child In Us.

As i trundle through the train station, i started to ponder how we have changed when we enter the working life. Not exactly the ideal thoughts you need for a good start to a Friday morning.

Flowerger's rant that people didn't help her when she fell, wasn't new. When a little girl drowned, no one tried to rescue her earlier despite two lifeguards on duty. Overall, it just seems that people turn into cold, heartless and ruthless bastards when they enter the working world. The helpful and happy children we once were, seemed to have vanished like the morning mist dissipated by the burning sun.

Isn't it sad, i thought as i entered the train, that we lose all our morality and happiness when we start working? As i glanced around for a place to stand, blank faces greeted me. Each occupied in their own thoughts and miserable lives. As the train rumbled through the stations, i thought about how we were as children.

When we were young, we were invincible. We were rebellious in our own right because we only thought for ourselves. We got hurt fast and healed fast, both mentally and physically. We didn't need to care about how others were doing. We didn't need to care about how food got onto the table. We didn't need to care about our pay and whether the boss knew how hard we worked.

All that mattered in our minds were friendships, how to attract the opposite sex, when the next meal was and when the next gathering was. Life was much simpler then. We just did as we were told, or did as we please. There wasn't any consequences for us to heed, nor any life's direction we needed to think about. We lived to the fullest, each day at a time in true spontaneity.

Those were the good times, i thought wryly as i shrugged through the crowd and stepped off at my train station. Now wounds take longer to heal, both mentally and physically. Now we have to worry about how others are doing. Now we need to care about how food got onto the table. Now we have to worry about our pay and whether the boss knew about hard we worked. Now we have to think for ourselves and push the work to others because we aren't paid to do their job.

Consequences are something we have to think of every single time we make a decision, sign something or do something. We push for confirmation 'in black and white' via email, writing or fax because others will bear the consequences. We don't dare to commit both verbally and in writing because of consequences. Every thing we do these days, we think over it again and again, pondering if we should do so and the consequences that come with it.

Should i help that girl that fell down? If so, will i get scolded because i implied that she's weak?

Should i help that guy who is drowning? Thats the lifeguard's job, not mine so why should i do someone else's work? Let them bear the consequences. Besides he might be having a cramp and he could recover by the time i swim over.

When was the last time we did something because we wanted to, and not because of the consequences? I thought sadly as i stared at our company's dark varnished door, rummaging into my pocket for the keys. As i signed in, and made my way to my cubicle, saying my 'good mornings', i realised that ultimately the one single fact remains.

We have changed.

Sunday, June 03, 2007

"Courage is the price that Life exacts for granting peace." - Amelia Earhart

"His voice was very soft in the dim room.

"There is nothing dishonorable about abandoning pain. Sometimes peace is most quickly found when a man simply stops avoiding it."

He shifted slightly in the dark.

"And you never again lay awake all night, staring at the darkness and thinking about them.""

- "Fool's Errand" by Robin Hobb