The Loss of Innocence, Naviety & The Child In Us.

As i trundle through the train station, i started to ponder how we have changed when we enter the working life. Not exactly the ideal thoughts you need for a good start to a Friday morning.

Flowerger's rant that people didn't help her when she fell, wasn't new. When a little girl drowned, no one tried to rescue her earlier despite two lifeguards on duty. Overall, it just seems that people turn into cold, heartless and ruthless bastards when they enter the working world. The helpful and happy children we once were, seemed to have vanished like the morning mist dissipated by the burning sun.

Isn't it sad, i thought as i entered the train, that we lose all our morality and happiness when we start working? As i glanced around for a place to stand, blank faces greeted me. Each occupied in their own thoughts and miserable lives. As the train rumbled through the stations, i thought about how we were as children.

When we were young, we were invincible. We were rebellious in our own right because we only thought for ourselves. We got hurt fast and healed fast, both mentally and physically. We didn't need to care about how others were doing. We didn't need to care about how food got onto the table. We didn't need to care about our pay and whether the boss knew how hard we worked.

All that mattered in our minds were friendships, how to attract the opposite sex, when the next meal was and when the next gathering was. Life was much simpler then. We just did as we were told, or did as we please. There wasn't any consequences for us to heed, nor any life's direction we needed to think about. We lived to the fullest, each day at a time in true spontaneity.

Those were the good times, i thought wryly as i shrugged through the crowd and stepped off at my train station. Now wounds take longer to heal, both mentally and physically. Now we have to worry about how others are doing. Now we need to care about how food got onto the table. Now we have to worry about our pay and whether the boss knew about hard we worked. Now we have to think for ourselves and push the work to others because we aren't paid to do their job.

Consequences are something we have to think of every single time we make a decision, sign something or do something. We push for confirmation 'in black and white' via email, writing or fax because others will bear the consequences. We don't dare to commit both verbally and in writing because of consequences. Every thing we do these days, we think over it again and again, pondering if we should do so and the consequences that come with it.

Should i help that girl that fell down? If so, will i get scolded because i implied that she's weak?

Should i help that guy who is drowning? Thats the lifeguard's job, not mine so why should i do someone else's work? Let them bear the consequences. Besides he might be having a cramp and he could recover by the time i swim over.

When was the last time we did something because we wanted to, and not because of the consequences? I thought sadly as i stared at our company's dark varnished door, rummaging into my pocket for the keys. As i signed in, and made my way to my cubicle, saying my 'good mornings', i realised that ultimately the one single fact remains.

We have changed.