There are times when it’s a source of personal pride to not be human.

"Moo..."
"Arf!"
Cow Has A New Friend.

-----

Shameful, isn't it?

The minute my repaired internet connection is finally up and running, my first post is something completely childish, irrelevant and immature.

Welcome to my world. :D

The Incurable Weirdness Poster Child

"Eh. How come the floodlights are on? National Day over already mah."

It was a simple question asked by me.

Tonight, after much discussion over coffee, it appears that i've been subsequently knighted by

King Roy-of-Pure-Oxygen-That-Keeps-The-Fire-Burning

and

Queen Rosie-of-Dry-Wood-That-Fuels-The-Fire.

I, thusly, have been knighted / renamed as

Osama-bin-Ensui,

The-One-Who-Started-The-Fire,

Instigator of all Conspiracy Theories,

Bringer of Aids and Ebola and Worldwide Epidemics and All Other Necessary Bad Things To Effect a Complete and Satisfactory Infamy.

... ...

...

*shakes head* Its great comfort to know that friends always have my best interests in mind. (-.-)

Words of Wisdom from Very Wise Taxi Drivers Part Two

Whenever i work late into the night, i usually take a taxi home if its after 10pm. Reason being because i'm usually dead-tired by then, and if i had to take the train, i still have to walk some distance, which i can't be bothered to. (-.-)

Last week late in night, when i took a taxi home, the driver and i chatted for a while. He remarked that he had been sending customers to the east side (Bedok area) all day, and now i'm another one. Following that, he then proceeded to tell me about all the different kinds of people that taxi drivers meet.

1. He was once behind another empty taxi, and saw it ignore a wheelchair-ed person who was trying to hail him. Furthermore, it was drizzling and the empty taxi just sped off. He angrily told me, "That guy had better pray and hope that he/his kin will not receive any disease or injury that will cause them to be wheelchair-bound. Because if they do, they will receive the same treatment like he had given." Bad karma, in other words.
   
2. He had picked up a young girl before and drove her home. Upon reaching the girl's home, she confessed to not having enough money. He then asked ironically, "So how?" The girl replied, "How ah. Let you touch me lor." He then furiously told her, "Eh. Girl. Don't play this kind of game. Next time no money, just say no money." The girl walked away, untouched and unpaid.
3. There was once where he had worked till late and was preparing to go home via one last trip. So he put up the sign "Yishun", signifying that he will only take customers to Yishun. A few kids hailed his taxi, and told him that they were going to Yishun. They then held up five fingers. He asked, "What? One person five dollars?" They replied, "No. Can fetch us all for five dollars?" He refused and the kids pleaded to him, saying that they only have so little money and needed to go home. He told them to wait till morning for the first bus/train.
4. His friend had picked up a young girl before, and the girl sat beside him at the passenger seat. Along the way, while changing gear, the girl grab his hand and laid it on her thighs, exclaiming that she was so cold and if he could feel her being so cold. At the end of the journey, the girl said she didn't have enough money. When asked further, she said, "Uncle, you touched me just now leh. So how arh?" She walked away, unpaid.
   

With such recounting and experiences, he has a few practices now:

• He doesn't let his female customers sit in the passenger seat beside him, for fear of Events 2 & 4 happening again.
• He is wary of picking up kids, because of the above-mentioned events.

Taxi drivers sure meet all kinds of people. If each of them could tell their stories on the people they meet, i'm sure we'll be able to profile all the different characters in this country. :D

The Truth Will Set Your Teeth Free.

National Day. The day where we gained independence. The day where we celebrate the birth of our country. The day where we show our love and affection for our homeland.

Do i love this country?

Perhaps we should explore what it means when we say we love this country.

When we say we love this country, it means that we love the country that has:

1. Drivers who turn without signaling / indicating,
2. People who push / shove their way into a crowded train, oblivious that there isn't any space at all and/or leaning on the grab-bars, ignoring the fact that their bodies are the size of Africa and that no one else can use it,
   
3. People who talk too loudly on their handphones or to their friends,
4. Kids who play music loudly on their handphones' speakers,
5. A single ruling party since the dinosaurs,
6. Advertisements which still use the symbol "@" eg. E-Centre @ Redhill, NYP @ Expo. C'mon guys, the "@" is out of fashion already! Move on!
7. The most screwed-up weather. It rains with the sun burning brightly, alternate between raining and burning hot within the hour and/or burning hot at 7am in the morning.
8. Parents who compare their children's grades and bequeath an unholy amount of stress on their children
9. Parents who spoil their children and/or not teaching them any manners
   

So. The question remains: Do i love this country?

No.

Don't get me wrong. I may not love this country, but my family is here and i grew up here. I have a duty and responsibility to protect it.

But do i love it?

I'm afraid not.