The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that none of it has tried to contact us.
I saw this quite some time ago on a Facebook application's discussion board. Enjoy. :)
You know you are stressed if...
- Relatives that have been dead for years come visit you and suggest that you should get some rest.
- You can achieve a "Runners High" by sitting up.
- You say the same sentence over and over again, not realizing that you have said it before.
- The Sun is too loud.
- Trees begin chasing you.
- You can see individual air molecules vibrating.
- You begin to explore the possibility of setting up an I.V. drip solution of expresso.
- You wonder if brewing is really a necessary step for the consumption of coffee.
- You can hear mimes.
- You believe that if you think hard enough, you can fly.
- Things become "Very Clear".
- You ask the drive-thru attendant if you can get your order to go.
- You say the same sentence over and over again, not realizing that you have said it before.
- You begin speaking in a language that only you and Channelers can understand.
- The less sense matter and matter is more than sense.
- You keep yelling "Stop Touching Me!!!" even though you are the only one in the room.
- Your heart beats in 7/8 time.
- You and Reality file for divorce.
- You can skip without a rope.
- It appears that people are speaking to you in binary code.
- You have great revelations concerning: Life, the Universe, and Everything else, but can't quite find the words for them before the white glow disappears, leaving you more confused than before.
- You can travel without moving.
- Antacid tablets become your sole source of nutrition.
- You discover the aesthetic beauty of office supplies.
- You have an irresistible urge to bite the noses of the people you are talking to.
- You say the same sentence over and over again, not realizing that you have said it before...
- Losing your mind was OK, but when the voices in your head quitted, it was like losing your best friend.
3 comments:
Have no fear, I is here... to clear all your theories :)
1. As technology progresses, everyone can send as many pre-recorded messages in a future time, like a will.
2. The feeling of "Runner's high" can be best described as a state of euphoria while running, likewise in other sports such as wrestling or sitting, the definition is in different forms but achieve the same results.
3. This is a subliminal message. Write me a cheque of SGD 10,000.
4. It is a heightened form of sense only felt by more intelligent lifeforms, thus the Sun can be loud, the water can be blue, or the wind can be grey.
5. The world is always spinning, thus it is perspective whether you're chasing the tree or the tree is chasing you.
6. With enhanced technology and the best cameras, you can "see" those vibrating air molecules.
7. IF NASA can compact all those cheeseburger into toothpaste form, it would not be long before modern science also allows you to also have a choice of I.V drip of vanilla, strawberry and chocolate.
8. Brewing coffee is a method devised to deceive customers to think that it is a premium product, juz like the invention of bras.
9. Well, if you tell them that their earnings is gonna be taxed by IRAS, you can actually hear the faint sound of their heart cracking .
10. It's true that we can fly if we think hard enough. If you're not flying, obviously you're not thinking hard enough.
11. Things are always clear when they have a solid form.
12. It's the only way if you know there's an attendent at the drive-thru.
13. This is a subliminal message. Write me a cheque of SGD 10,000. 14. You do have to communicate with your communicatee, else the communication is not communicatable.
15. That is why what matters more, is not senseless.
16. It's probrably time for you to get a dog.
17. Obviously, the reason is you can't count beyond 7.
18. You can file divorce with Faith, Fate, Anger, Wealth and etc... the names people take up nowadays are so inspirational.
19. You can jog without standing too.. jog my memory.
20. Each professional group has their lingoes, I would suggest staying away from the IT programmers.
21. I think you need to go to an electrical store and get a new torch.
22. As I said before the world is always spinning, we're always moving.
23. They must be missing out on the main food types - caffine, chocolates, alcohol and sex.
24. Sometimes, in the "exciting" work environment, people tends to be extremely creative.
25. It is a symptom that you're going back into kittenhood, unless you've been neutered.
26. This is a subliminal message. Write me a cheque of SGD 10,000.
27. All you have to do is look into your throat and you can find your voice box.
lol! I love this one - You have an irresistible urge to bite the noses of the people you are talking to.
lol! gosh. I really would like to be that stressed and experience that. Bite the noses of the ppl I talk to LOL!!!!
so adorable.
Anonymous: Just how bored were you when you thought of all that?! I think you should stick to Facebook or something. :)
Dramaqueen: Heh. Personally, i rather like the last one about the voices in my head. :D
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