If you can’t win by reason, go for volume.

Ok. I'll be the first to admit that i'm a kantang.

I only got a B3 for my 'O' level Chinese by luck and i got a C5 for my 'AO' level Chinese by chance. The only reason why i didn't fail on both occasions, is because the marker probably reached his quota for failing people and gave me sympathy marks for me to pass.

However, i still can write, converse and listen to a little bit of Chinese. Writing, saying and hearing my chinese name counts, doesn't it? So i'm not really a kantang, right? A full kantang is one who cannot read, talk or listen to Chinese at all. So i'm probably half a kantang (where half = 1/2 = 0.5 = 50%).

Speaking of which, if

English = kantang,

therefore it stands to reason that

Chinese = rice?

Hhhmmm... Lets just work on that basis then.

After much 'education' from the army and two years of talking to contractors, my mother has commented any number of times that my Hokkien is improving. However, i can't write Hokkien. So how does this language fit in? And since

English = kantang
Chinese = rice,

therefore by following the same line of reasoning,

Hokkien = prawn noodles?

Hhhmmm.... Lets continue working on that basis.

Since we have already establish that i am half a kantang (where half = 1/2 = 0.5 = 50%), it also stands to reason that the rice and prawn noodles will occupy the remaining space. This can be calculated by a very complex equation as follows:

kantang + rice + prawn noodles = Me
rice + prawn noodles = Me - kantang

Since Me = 1 = 100%, kantang = half = 1/2 = 0.5 = 50%,

rice + prawn noodles = 1 - 1/2 = 1 - 0.5 = 100% - 50%

rice + prawn noodles = 1/2 = 0.5 = 50%

Since rice = listen + talk + read, prawn noodles = listen + talk,

(listen + talk + read) + (listen + talk) = 50%

therefore, assuming listen = talk = read = 10%,

rice = 30%

prawn noodles = 20%

And since i'm an engineer, of course i have a nice little graph to show you how it looks like.

Tada!

So. What is your language composition? :)