Sunday, January 28, 2007

The majority of work in this thesis is original. However, some assistance with material and research has been provided by my fellow Gong-ers: Part 1

It has been a great week, catching up with friends and chatting. However, our chatting wasn't on any ordinary mundane topic.

Oh no.

Our discussions were most profound. In fact, in our infinite wisdom as graduates from the University of Wollongong, we have come up with a number of theories that will one day change the entire world.

Theory One:
If you swirl your saliva in your mouth fast enough, you can make ice. Whats more, the ice that you produce will be rectangular, due to the shape of your mouth.
Furthermore, people with dimples can make ice faster because the dimples are like valleys and therefore the shape of the mouth will become like an hourglass shape. 0.o

Theory Two:
What is a shape of a ball?
If your answer is round/circular, you're wrong. The answer is a sphere. Most people will say its round/circular because we have been screwed up by our country's education, and therefore lack creativity to think out of the box, and hence can only look at a ball in a two-dimensional way. We must learn how to view things in a three-dimensional way.
Whats more, if you trace the outline of a circle in the air, its perpendicular to the floor. But if you flip the outline so that its parallel to the floor, it becomes a sphere. 0.0

Theory Three:
If any word has a double 'L' in it, it usually relates to a circular shape. Examples are the words 'roll' and 'ball'.
Wait. Hang on. A 'Wall' is not always circular. Neither is a 'Doll'. Dang. Blast. -.-

Theory Four:
Godzilla cannot be asexual, despite what was said in the movie, because it kidnapped the woman. In fact, the woman is used as a baton to tag turns between King Kong and Godzilla. o.o

Theory Five:
In some coffeeshops, Milo is also known as 'Ta-Kiu' (Hokkien for kick-ball >.<) because the can of Milo always shows soccer players kicking a ball. Lipton Tea is known as 'Diao-Hu' (Hokkien for fishing >.<) because you dip the Lipton tea bag in and out of your cup, like someone fishing.
So, 'Ta-Kiu Zero' will mean that the drinks stall will freeze the Milo for you, because the 'Zero' stands for the temperature i.e. zero degrees Celsius. And 'Ta-Kiu-cino' will mean that the drinks stall will add more milk. 0.0

Theory Six:
The drinks stall in coffeeshops get their ice in two possible ways.
The first way is to get ice from the dessert stall. The dessert stall uses a machine to shave ice for their dishes, and there will be eventually be a small piece of ice left which cannot be shaved. This piece of ice will be given to the drinks stall to serve to their customers. Unfortunately, because the ice is so small, you will need approximately ten or so of those said ice pieces to put in a drink.
Therefore, you can only have your drink with ice if the dessert stall has sold more than ten ice kachangs. 0.o
The second way is that some guy from the drinks stall will rock up with a huge block of ice in one hand and an icepick in another hand. Then, much like a prim and proper waiter in an italian restaurant with a pepper grinder, he will ask if you want ice in your drink. If you say yes, he will then proceed to chop and hack on the huge ice block with the icepick until you say 'when'.
In fact, there are some guys who are so skillful that they can hack and chop the ice block into a tiny ice sculpture (like Mickey Mouse or Donald Duck) to put in your drink. o.0

Theory Seven:
In some countries, there are formation of rain clouds but rain never comes. The solution to this is to fly a plane into those rain clouds and spray some salt into the clouds. This will allow the water molecules to cling onto the salt, and therefore fall as rain.
Hence, if you toss hay into those same rain clouds, the water molecules will then cling onto those strands of hay and then float to the ground in a swaying fashion, much like how a feather floats to the ground when thrown in the air.
Won't that be an incredible sight, having rain floating to the ground in a swaying fashion. o.o

If you feel lost and don't understand the above seven theories, dun feel alone.

We really are rubbish. -.-

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

Didn't know we came up with so much nonsense, I almost die of laughter reading it, hahaha... but that's really fun, we should do it more often eh, hahaha...

kruder said...

interesting theories

Anonymous said...

very promising graduates you got there lol!

Unknown said...

Rosie: Oh yes. Surprising isn't it, how much rubbish we can come up with. Just goes to show how good our uni is. :D

Kruder: Yep, they are most interesting. Give us another week or so, and we'll come up with a thousand more of such theories. :p

Dramaqueen: If anyone asks where we study our degrees, tell them we graduated from the University of Wollongong. :D

Jude said...

livwait a minute. who came up with theories from 5-7? Must be that blonde dimpled guy crappy.. haha!

from now on, my mondays are occupied with hip hop and jazz dances. don't disturb me. >_<

Unknown said...

Puppetress: Theories Five to Seven was concocted by us while we were idling at the beach. :p

Green Ogre said...

Laughs. I recall having boh liao conversation in that ilk.

flowerger said...

the theories are the result of a great friendship =)